Episode 248: Super Earth Defense Force

War. War never changes. You’re always just flying around in your single aircraft, you against an entire invading enemy force. Maybe they’re aliens? They’re probably aliens. Your only allies are two little drones by your side. Not even an imperiled frog or cocky falcon to get your back. Its just you against all of space, in Super Earth Defense Force.

Episode 219 M.U.S.H.A.


As with many a story, this one begins in space, with Space Japan being Space Attacked by some sort of giant Space Monster. In this particular case, it's Space Skynet. Of course, the only reasonable response to this threat is to make a giant humanoid robot that basically never actually walks (and instead flies?!) to attack Space Skynet's rampaging armies. At least you have some sweet tunes and majestic views to aid you in your journey!

Episode 213: Pocky and Rocky with Becky

Ever wonder what ancient tanuki got up to?  Apparently, the answer is "hang out with adorable priestesses and learn shinto demon banishing techniques".  Also, destroy a lot of paper in pursuit of those two hobbies.  Thankfully, this game is true enough to its cutesy aesthetic that things never get to rocky, so you could probably be nomming some pocky while you're playing.  Also, something about Becky.

Episode 197: ADRIAAAN Is In Another Castle [Secret Command]

There comes a time in every actions star's career when they get to be a big enough name, that someone is bound to make a videogame based on the movie they were in.  In order to get the jump on other developers, some companies decided to just make the game, and apply licensing post-hoc.  As it happens, this tends to not make for the greatest games.  So, run through the jungle with us as definitely-not-Mr.-Stallone wades through hordes of bland and forgettable enemies to... do a thing?  Maybe aliens?

Our downloads take no prisoners.

Show Notes

(02:00) The Super… I mean, Sunman game Geremy was talking about.

(04:15) PubG… with Zmobies!

(06:30)  The new Star Guardian skins in League of Legends are Magicalgirltastic! Geremy updated his client and everything!

(11:00) Geremy tries to explain Danganronpa while realizing he’s almost completely uninformed about it! And yet he still manages to get pretty much everything right! I’d link something from it, but feel like everything is a spoiler. They're fantastic games that you should definitely go play, though.

(14:45) The Long Dark, another game Geremy fails to describe adequately.

(22:30) We talk about Dragon Ball for far longer than intended, thanks to Magical Girls.

(27:45) The Assignment, Secret Command, a.k.a Rambo

(32:45) The non-American box art to Secret Command, as compared to the Rambo box art in the US.

(37:15) Rankings Time!

Next time on Last Time, Metroid: Zero Mission!

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Episode 193: Muscle Men in Space [Cho Aniki]

When the galaxy's best body build comes a-knockin', there's only one thing to do: team up with two weird angel children and send your own body building... flying... mutant... guys? No one builds a protein plant out of Earth, even if they do have great abs! Defend important areas, like downtown streets, a football stadium I guess?, and the moon for some reason. All in the name of amazing muscles.

Exercise that download link.

Show Notes

(01:15) Geremy’s Kuwabara voice is awful, but Lanipator’s is spot on!

(03:15) Kitschy.

(07:45) Cube and Star, an Arbitrary Game

(10:30) The game Zach got Tyler is Material Girl. Of course it's rated "very positive".

(12:15) Zach’s playing This War of Mine. He didn’t ask for that damn war.

(14:30) Zach has been playing a lot; next is Valkyrie Drive. For the curious, Dynasty Warriors 8 had 83 playable characters, about ten times what Valkyrie Drive does.

(21:30) Counterstrike and a discussion about Smurfs! Wait, that’s not the right link…

(23:00) Snipperclips! It’s a right snippy doo.

(26:45)  Definite Future Assignment Final Fantasy X. Is it good!? Does it hold up? Hahahahaha?

(30:30) Spoilers for Persona 5! Makoto is the best character!

(44:00) The assignment, Cho Aniki.

(53:30) Body Builder Rankings!

Next time on Last Time, Turok!  The original one, obv.

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Episode 191: Big Hairy Feet [Fantasy Zone II]

Some times, one hit isn't enough.  You just have to do it again.  So, you take a sip of that sweet flying ship, and you're off.  Trippy landscapes and odd warp zones await you, and you can swear you have wings.  Which you do, because you're a sentient ship pod with feet.  Also, there are wood totems and weird spinny clam things to shoot, so you had best be off to do whatever it is winged/legged ships do.

The downloads of Opa Opa.

Next time on Last Time, Another World!

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Episode 127: Gudo Gamu- GO! [Gley Lancer]

We're back from a long hiatus to save our collective father with a prototype spaceship!  Despite having no pilot's training, we're sure we're up to the task, especially with all these options... for shooting things!  Hopefully none of us become too distracted with the scenery on the way.  Onward, Red Tridenter!

Scatter Download!

Show Notes

(02:00) Last Time on Sitcoms.

(07:00) Cloudbuilt!  It's super fun and crazy hard to get high ranks on a lot of missions.  No mistakes!

(08:30) Poor Raticate.  Still haven't finished Undertale, so here's this.

(15:30) Zach played Overwatch, which sounds great.

(16:15) COD: BlOps3: Revenge of the Mannequins.

(23:00) Zach's initial thoughts about Splatoon.  Turf can have the WORST matchmaking.

(27:10) Zach, Kevin (who has yet to be on an episode), and Tyler played some 7 Days to Die.  And by play, we mean experienced some of the best server problems ever.

(30:00) Geremy's making some Gundams.

(34:00) More MGS V.  There have been some complaints of tonal dissonance.

(38:30) Gley Lancer, GO!  It looks pretty great.

(39:45) Separating the background from the foreground is a problem on some levels, most prominently the first.  Choosing your control scheme is mostly just novelty; you'll find your favorite (Search) and just always use it.

(47:00) Ranking!

Next time on Last Time, KOTOR!

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Episode 122: Use The Force, Zach [R-Type]

Gear up and get ready for a journey into the heart of space... monsters. Grab your force and fly through hordes of monsters with us as we tackle an arcade classic and see just how far our endurance will take us. Pew pew!

You can attach our download in the rear.

Show Notes

(04:00) Doctor Doom is great and Tyler's on Dorkly too much.

(08:30) New fan theory: Splatoon is Valhalla.

(11:45) Zeus got around.

(18:00) General discussion of the awesome mechanics of Pokemon X/Y.

(24:30) The "Super" Show.

(30:00) R-Type!

(41:30) Ranked!  Pokemon TCG, Super C, and... This week's game!

Next time on Last Time, 1080° Snowboarding, featuring Alex!

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Episode 114: Escargot Around Every Corner [Alien Storm]

Fight some ugly nosed noble-tier aliens with us this week by... pistol whipping them!  No need to waste ammo, kids.  You'd really think a game with a Tesla Cannon would be cooler.  Because EVO, we talk hit a bunch of fighting games before hitting those aliens, and we wander around mechs for a bit.  In the end, we finally upset our ranking list a fair bit.

Like a bolt of alien lightning, our download shocks straight to the hard drive.

Show Notes

(03:00) Zero's last match at EVO this year.

(05:45) Woshige FTL.

(08:15) They Bleed Pixels!  If you like really hard platformers, this is one for you.  Also, eldritch horrors are adorable.

(12:00) Luffy can't be a thief; he's too busy punching things.

(17:15) Geremy's reactions to Metal Gear Solid 5: Ground Zeroes.

(24:55) Some sort of aliens.  It's like 3 mediocre games got smashed together!  Arguable the best portion is a side scrolling shooter, which you only get to do once as far as we could tell.

(33:40) Starting the rankings this week with Fire Emblem, followed by Xanac.  Bringing up the rear (but also really not) is Chrono Trigger!

Next time on Last Time, Sonic the Hedgehog and Sonic the Hedgehog 2 for the Master System!

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Episode 99: Construction Is Over [Zanac]

Because this week's game is about a vertical space shooter, clearly this week's theme is... tanks!  Lots of tanks.  Also, DBZ, but that's more of a theme in the podcast than any individual episode.  While we're at it, we talk a bit about everyone's favorite game that randomly makes you stop moving to fight a building.  Riveting stuff here, folks.

Our download can either wiggle a little bit or kill every virus on its way to your computer.  Seems like a fair trade.

Show Notes

(01:00)  Snarky skulls and chainsaw massacres!

(03:00) The pistol guy in Killer 7 is Coyote.  Reading his bio should make you understand why this game was critically acclaimed and commercially panned.

(04:00) Trifroze's Falcon!

(09:00) Dillon's Rolling Western is a really cool concept that suffers from some control/mechanic issues.

(13:30) Heroes 6 is pretty fun... still.  Unfortunately, most games, including this one, needs a text size on option for larger screens.

(21:00) League: one of the few contexts where "fed as hell" doesn't involve bloating.  Related: Nemesis Mode sounds pretty cool.

(27:30) Kirby vs. Majin Buu!

(32:00) DBZ Xenoverse: The Adventures of Dumplin!

(34:30) Fire Man!

(37:00) Turns out the way to make money in Fallen London is just selling your 5000 jade fragments and take the exchange hit.

(39:45) Tanks and guns on tanks.

(43:00) Guys, a good game published by Sega in the 2010s!  Also, more tanks.

(50:00) H1Z1 is like a terrible DayZ.

(53:30) Zanac: It's better than Star Soldier!

Next time on Last Time, our episode 100 retrospective!

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Episode 97: Road Construction... In Space! [Star Soldier]

When there are floating heads
In your local group
Who you gonna call?
Star Soldier!
Though, the floating space heads do seem awfully productive. Maybe they contract at reasonable rates?

The route to our download is fraught with guys holding stop signs.

Show Notes

(01:30) Apparently the WWE sucked this year.  Who knew?

(04:00) Silly Metroid Prime.  The trilogy is available on the Wii U VC now, though.

(05:30) The Payday Bomb Heist DLC is actually pretty fun.  The dock's generally fun, and the forest a pretty big change in map layout.

(11:00) I can't believe we haven't linked this before.

(12:00) Dilbert is apparently Vulcan.

(14:00) Infamous problems.

(21:30) Civ 5's narrator is apparently William Morgan Sheppard, who primarily does voice acting for videogames.

(29:00) Fallen London is a vaguely Lovecraftian web based game.  Despite Geremy's answer to Zach's question, there's totally a character named Jack-of-Smiles.  It's pretty fun!

(40:00) Star Soldier, where the enemies forget they're not in Galaga.  This game has big problems with telegraphing collision boundaries.

(45:00) Thief Town and Spy Party both look pretty interesting as couch multiplayer games.

(49:15) A quick rundown of the power progression.  We also compare it to Gradius and King's Knight.

Next time on Last Time, Fire Emblem!  Tactical Aristocracy Action!

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Episode 91: And They Couldn't Put Humpty Dumpty Back Together Again [King's Knight]

Remember those epics where knights shoot their sword lasers at things? No? I mean... Zelda's an epic, right? Anyway, join us on a magical adventure to save a princess and rebuild the king!

Downloads are the new powerdowns!

Show Notes

(00:40) Ed joins us!

(07:10) From the people who brought you Layton: Weapon Shop de Omasse.  Related: Jacksmith.

(12:40) John Wick was pretty decent.

(16:30) Sm4sh!

(20:00) Gihren's Greed is a pretty sweet looking game.

(30:00) Dragon Age: Inquisition is Zach's current conquest.

(38:30) This week's game: Bar USA, Monster at Law.

(50:00) Killer Bee: master rapper.

Next time on Last Time, Fallout!

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Episode 82: Fightin' Ufoes [Galaga and Asteroids]

Once again tackling two arcade titles, we now venture into space!  Apparently, all ships in videogame space are triangular to improve their aerodynamics.  While that doesn't help you fly through space, maybe it lets people hear you scream better?  I suppose if your exhaust is funneled behind you...  At any rate, come break rocks into smaller rocks and shoot endless hordes of space bugs with us!

Our download breaks into pieces then carries itself off.

Show Notes

(01:30) For the interested, 8-bit Crazy Train and 8-bit Ghostbusters.

(02:10) Not that it's a surprise, but the Super Sm4sh demo is fun, and the full version comes out tomorrow as of this post.  Hadouken!  It's a bit awkward on the 3DS, leaving us to think the Wii U is the better platform for it.

(06:50) Hyrule Warriors is out, apparently.

(9:30) Mojang has been sold for 2.5 billion U.S.D..  Fear the oncoming Minecraft 2.  Speaking of which, Minetest is the opensource C++ clone.

(18:00) We discuss how Microsoft is likely going to monetize Minecraft.

(26:20) League of Legends championship!

(33:00) Asteroids lets you fight rocks and ufoes!  While fun, the sounds are a bit distracting.

(38:00) Galaga's pretty fun, kids!

Next time on Last Time, we kick of Mobile Month with Super Mario Land!

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Episode 65: What Shoe Size Does Your Ship Have? [Fantasy Zone]

Every so often, there is a game so weird, bizarre, and nonsensical that it defies explanation. This... is not that game. While weird, Fantasy Zone is an ambitious but, lamentably, fairly predictable scrolling shooter. Let's get walking!

Just land here and walk on over to our download; it's only got a 10 second timer, though.

(01:45) Fire Emblem: Legend of the Abnormal Hair Colors!

(02:15) Japan has decidedly interesting advertising techniques.

(03:50) Mana Khemia's pretty good.  Go play it!

(06:50) Zach's Diablo II adventures.

(07:30) Geremy runs down the LCS.

(16:00) How team sponsoring works in the LCS.

(18:15) Games with Fantasy in their name have not had a great track record in this show.

(19:30) Really plays like some other games, but seems lacking.

(25:25) There are a few good ideas here, especially for the publication year.

(26:30) Non-sequitur: Blitzball!

(29:15) Weirdness overload makes this game seem rather bland.

(33:00) Why games didn't use to have tutorials: they were very simple.

(33:40) Tutorial levels.

Next time on Last Time, Street Fighter II!

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Episode 52: The Jokes Write Themselves [S. C. A. T.]

Get to the... spinny death laser things! Two agents, taking on an entire alien invasion force from a civilization with markedly more advanced technology? No problem; we've got the 80s on our side!

Press A to lock your download in place!

Show Notes

(01:00) Would you believe it's been one entire year of regular episodes?  We reminisce a bit.

(04:30) Colosseum, the game where it's finally acceptable to steal Pokemon.  Also, Rosalina.

(05:30) We kvetch about Arkham: Origins a bit.  We're not the only ones with that opinion, though.

(06:30) Starwhal's in Early Access on Steam!  Tyler rambles about the changes from the demo so far.

(09:30) Talking about League, we mention a recent study about Internet trolls.

(11:45) Be careful where you tread; it's worth watching, though.

(13:00) This is a thing, and it makes me happy.

(15:00) Geremy talks about the current gen Pokemon trading system.

(18:00) Titanfall looks pretty good if you're into shooters and mechs.

(22:00) Start Citizen's dogfighting is coming "soon."

(23:30) Teenage mutant... hero... turtles?

(24:30) S.C.A.T. has voices in spots and is a shooter.

(26:10) Stop! It's sexy time!

(27:30) Rotating satellites are pretty awesome in shooters.

(34:00) Feedback is really important, and this game lacks it a bit.

Next time on Last Time, Alex Kidd in Miracle World!

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Episode 41: We Will Build A Wall [Life Force]

This week, we look at the sequel to one of our (read: Tyler's) favorite games for the show: Life Force!  It's basically Gradius, but not!  Get ready for some fancy flying as we veer up and slightly to the left of a pretty good game and into the territory of what we're actually playing.

I'd take an option that just downloads things for me while I walk around.

(01:30) Sweet new mixer time!  Internet celebrities.

(04:00) Join the hosts (not Tyler) in playing LoL some time!  State of Decay is still awesome.  Pills are super helpful.  Also, I found this, and it's awesome.

(09:30) Another DayZ comparison; maybe Tyler has PTDZD.

(10:20) These flash games are fun.

(14:00) For posterity!  It's an anime-themed fighter.

(17:20) Seriously, don't give these people money.

(18:45) Geremy's 3 gripes with Arkham Origins' combat changes.

(24:00) Detective mode!

(28:00) *Sean Connery voice* Yesh, fluffy...

(32:00) Spoilers(?) for New Horizons.

(36:30) Join Geremy's Fantasy eSports league!

(39:30) Life Force!  It has some arbitrary problems.  It's basically Gradius with cooler bosses and multiplayer.

(46:30) We talked about this one a while ago, but apparently it's applicable to a space shooter?

(50:00) Consequenceless deaths as a teaching tool.  It can also be painful.

Next time on Last Time, it's Tecmo Bowl!

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Episode 8: What Exactly is a Gradius? [Gradius]

First off, we apologize for the poor audio quality on this episode, especially on Tyler’s end.  We have a new audio setup, and he was turned down a bit further than he should have been, while Geremy was up a bit higher.  This should be fixed for the next episode.

Our zany adventures continue as we fight our way through hordes of wacky moai misfits and belligerent bionic battle suits in the arcade classic, Gradius!  This game has a record for being incredibly difficult, a testament to the adopted slogan "Nintendo Hard."  For the sake of this, we'll ignore that Gradius is on every system ever.  Listen in as we test out some new audio equipment and find out whether this game withstood the test of time.

Download all power to the forward lasers!

(2:00) What we’ve been playing and watching.

(5:30) We talk about Slender and discuss this video a bit.  NSFW (Language)

(7:00) The Assignment: Gradius

(10:00) Power-Up!

(18:00) Just how hard is Gradius?

(21:00) Gradius compared to Mario, and the transition from Arcade to Home Console.

Next week, we jump back forward to the Super Nintendo and take on some Japanese Culture with The Legend of the Mystical Ninja.  Probability of Naruto jokes 95%!  Don’t miss it!

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